i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
