I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
