i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
