why im i the only drunk person in the library?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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