you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize