Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
