Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
you will always have a special place in my vag
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
