so explain again why im purple
no
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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