I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
