my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
