I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
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