I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize