Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
