just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
