I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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