i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I currently don't understand fingers.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
