i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
