I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
my being single is dangerous.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
