They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
