Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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