if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
