Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
