if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
