I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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