i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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