I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
