I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
