Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
