you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize