I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
