you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
