Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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