Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
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