Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
