Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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