I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize