I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
