Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
how do you play pong handcuffed?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
