u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I checked into jail on foursquare
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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