Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Someone came in the potted fern
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
