I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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