He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
