What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize