i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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