break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
