my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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