The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
It was confusing and full of hummus
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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