Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
