oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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