you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
