Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
